My husband and I have two children that are affected by the Autism Spectrum Disorder. We both suspected that something was wrong with our oldest child around the age of one year old. My husband started to suspect Autism and did some extensive research about this PDD (Pervasive Developmental Disorder). I refused to label him until the time he was diagnosed with ASD at the tender age of three. A year later, his little sister was also diagnosed with Autism at the age of two years old.

Telling our relatives

My husband had only one close relative, his older brother, about our children’s Autism. Being a teacher who previously taught children on the Spectrum, he understood and did not judge them. He is patient with them and accepts them easily.

The problems started to arise on my side of the family. As I told them, I faced a variety of reactions which hurt more despite their efforts not to cause us more grief. We ended up confronting: denial, refusal of the diagnosis, derogatory comments, being blamed, denying possible genetic history and so much more but the worst ones were pity and uncomfortable silence. Now, our children have been diagnosed for two years and my relatives still feel and react the same way.

Is information the solution?

For the last two years, I have tried to explain and give examples to explain to them what Autism really is, its symptoms, the behaviors and other type of useful information to end up with comments such as: “Is your son like a little rain man?” Or: “This is not from our side of the family!” Another comment would be: “I knew you were too old to have children!”

Then one day, as I was chatting on MSN Messenger with my sister while using a video camera, she saw my son flapping his hands as he was getting excited about something that caught his attention. The first thing I knew, she was not only asking questions but also really interested in finding out everything about Autism as it touched her so deeply. Since then, she has been searching on the internet as well as brochures and documentaries.

Each time that we talk, she asks more questions and gradually shares this newly found information with my brother, my parents and other relatives and friends.

There is nothing like living with Autism to understand it better!

After not seeing her grandchildren for a period of five years for our son and three for our daughter, my mother finally decided to leave her beloved Eastern province where French is the main language for our English speaking Western province. She came to get two know her grandchildren.

The second day of her visit was New Year’s Day and also the time when I learned that until recently, she did not want to come because of her denial of the diagnosis of Autism and also the fact that she was scared to see how badly they would be affected by it.

She also confided that she learned more about Autism Spectrum Disorder in two days than knew about it, being a nurse for the past nineteen years. Her excitement and relief are both genuine. She has been observing and understanding their reactions, their sensitivities and their behaviors very quickly.

While I confided in her that I was scared that she would misjudge them and not care as them as much to avoid a heartbreak, she understood not only my fears but also how her comments and the ones made by other relatives were sometimes hurtful through the years.

Seeing Autism and living with it make the difference!

Now, not only is my mother planning her next trip with us, but she is taking pictures and mentally and emotionally recording and enjoying every moment spent with them. She has discovered that although ASD can be frightening when unknown, children with the Autism Spectrum Disorder need love, affection and that you can enjoy their company when you understand what Autism is and how to approach it successfully.

My name is Sylvie Leochko. As the mother of two young children with Autism, I wish to share my knowledge and expericence with other parents especially the ones that recently faced the diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder for their child. If you wish to get more ideas, information and tips on ASD, I invite you to visit our site: http://autism-spectrum.blogspot.com or http://autism.findoutnow.org

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