0
Reviews [ add review ],
Article rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Author : Brenda Van Niekerk
Many times a person has been badly hurt by someone and consciously or unconsciously they want revenge. They are not sure how to set about this so revert to
Having anger tantrums to give themselves a sense of power and control over others.
It is their belief that they have the right to vengeance as the other party deserves it and it is their right make them pay for whatever they are supposed to have done.
The best way to rid yourself of these feelings is to forgive the person who hurt you in the first place. Say it out aloud to yourself. Mention the person's name and say "I forgive you for ………" it is amazing how this works to restore your peace of mind.
Another form of revenge is the person who will not speak to anyone when he is angry. He thinks by sitting alone and not speaking or acknowledging anyone he will be punishing them. This type of manipulation is best ignored by the other party.
Anger is often caused by the feeling that someone other than yourself is to blame for your circumstances. You might have suppressed feelings that your parents or teachers were responsible for certain negatives that occurred in your life. You feel trapped in a situation that you feel you have no control over. You refuse to take responsibility for anything that has happened to you and transfer blame to everyone around you so that you do not have to look at your own faults.
Every time you lose your temper you are actually letting these past experiences ignite your anger afresh. You will never be free from this type of anger until you have
forgiven those who you believe have harmed you. They do not even have to know that you are forgiving them. Maybe they are no longer alive. It does not matter you are doing this to free yourself of these hostile emotions.
Only then will you be able to move on with your life and be free of unnecessary anger. You can now take responsibility for what happens in your life with the knowledge that past experiences do not have to influence the present anymore.
Many angry people feel that they are not being treated fairly. They see every situation as being unfair and will spend their lives fighting and being angry because life is not fair.
They might resent the fact that they were not born into a rich home and were brought up poor. By being angry and aggressive toward everyone you meet is not going to change the situation.
Let's face it nothing is one hundred per cent fair - that is life. There will always be the poor and the rich, the healthy and the unhealthy, the intelligent people and the not so intelligent. We live in an imperfect world so deal with it and decide rather to fight for happiness which everyone can achieve in one way or another.
Happiness is a choice no matter what state you are in. Rather direct this anger into a passion for making others happy. Try visiting children in hospital or old folk in homes that do not often get visitors. You will soon find that by making others happy you will not have the desire to have temper tantrums about things you cannot change.
