Over involvement is a serious sign of burn out.

When you are over involved, you begin to look at the person you provide care for as a series of tasks that need to be performed, rather than, thinking, "What can I do to help them?" You may be in trouble if you can't separate your feelings of anxiety from that person.

A good indication of this would be cringing when you hear then walking, or you think to yourself, "what now?"

Another indication is if you find yourself doing personal care tasks in a brisk and rough manor.

You may begin to spend as much time as possible in the other room, so you don't have to even look at the person you are providing care for.

Or perhaps,you find yourself muttering nasty words, or thoughts under your breath, while providing care.

I know from talking to other caregivers that these feelings are real. These feelings are nothing to be ashamed of, they just mean you need to get help quickly. When a caregiver is at this point they are on the verge of abusing the person to whom they are providing care.

Here are some common forms of elder abuse.

Physical Abuse, slapping, hitting, pinching, pushing, sexual abuse and restraining.

Mental Abuse, calling names, belittling, intimadating, and threatening.

Exploitation, taking money or items that do not belong to you.

Neglect, not providing for the basic needs of the elderly person. Ignoring medical problems or not getting them the help they need.

As caregivers we have a responsibility to protect those we care for, when we can't separate our feelings of burn out from the person we are caring for, we have a potentially serious situation. Be aware of your negative feelings, they are the warning signs that say,"Get Help." ~ Dutchy

Renee "Dutchy" Reeves is an Elder Care Consultant with over 10 years of working with the elderly and their families. Her online advice column, "Ask Dutchy" provides practical ideas and advice for assisting the elderly with Alzheimer’s disease, Dementia, Parkinson's, disability, and those needing long term care. See other articles by her at http://www.askdutchy.mycarelink.net

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