I've a confession to make. I used to be Santa Claus. Not the real Santa, of course, but one of the Shopping Mall Santas who help out the Big Guy in Red, filling in for him in department stores and malls around the country talking to children and having their pictures taken with them. A great part time job that lasts only one month a year, from the day after Thanksgiving up to Christmas Eve.

How did I get into this gig? By answering a help wanted ad in the local newspaper that said, simply, "Now Hiring Santas. Training Provided." And a number. I had no idea until that day that temporary employment agencies provided Santas for stores, but as a child I'd sat on the big elf's lap, told him my holiday desires, and truly believed that he would provide the GI Joe, the Schwinn bicycle, and the Daisy BB gun that I asked for. The chance to learn the secrets of Santa magic, spread delight to children, and get paid at the same time seemed too good to pass up.

Santa School, it turned out, was an all day event, and a serious endeavor. The company showed a video tape of successful Santas talking to kids, showed us all how to put on our costumes, apply a pillow for the proper padding, adjust the wig and beard, and how to add a touch of white make-up to eyebrows and any exposed natural facial hair. And more importantly, we learned the "do's" and "don'ts" of the Santa trade. Do remind the child to be good, to do well in school, and to smile for the camera, as well as calling the child by name. Don't promise specific gifts (unless prompted by a nod from the adult accompanying the child), don't refer to the child's "parents" or "mom and dad" since many children are in single parent homes, or are raised by other relatives -instead Santa would always refer to "your folks" - and (this is a big one) don't "Ho Ho Ho." Loud Ho Ho Ho's tend to scare some kids, especially the younger ones who are a little apprehensive of Santa to start with. Santa should be jovial and friendly, but not scary, so the Ho Ho Ho's had to go.

What I received from this experience, in addition to the promised paycheck, was a feeling of having brought joy and wonder into the lives of several small children. Add to that a couple of damp pairs of red Santa pants when youngsters became "overly excited" and had not visited the rest room prior to their Santa visit, and amusement when a few "grown up kids" decided to have their pictures taken with Santa, and the experience was definitely worth doing. The most interesting "person" to sit on Santa's lap was a young woman's pet ferret. The ferret was friendly and enjoyed her visit-especially the chance to crawl through Santa's beard. Her owner said the picture of Santa with Wendy the Ferret in his beard would grace her Christmas cards that year. It was a great, fun experience. So if you like kids, have a large lap, and can find the work, being a Shopping Mall Santa is a part-time job you can't beat.

Paul Buckley has published a website packed full of fascinating and useful articles, stories and ideas certain to make this you best holiday season yet. Happy Holidays

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