The one thing you don't want to do on the day of the wedding is stand up to make your speech and try to “wing” it. Trying to make a speech up off the top of your head is a recipe for disaster. Chances are you'll forget what you wanted to say, ramble on about unrelated matters, and say some things you may later wish you hadn't.

“Now wait,” you may be saying, “I've seen plenty of people who did great jobs and they seemed to be giving a completely spontaneous speech.” Fair enough, but the key word here is “seemed.” The majority of speeches we see, especially the ones that appear to be spontaneous and unplanned, are just the opposite. These speeches have been planned to such an extent that the speaker can deliver them so that it appears the words are coming to him off the top of his head. This type of speaking is known as extemporaneous.

Extemporaneous speaking allows you to plan out what you want to say but also forces you to practice it so that you can deliver your words with only a handful of notes instead of a word-for-word manuscript. There are a number of reasons why extemporaneous speaking is the best choice for a wedding speech:

• Because you aren't reading a manuscript, you will be able to make eye contact with guests which adds a sense of sincerity and warmth to your speech.

• Because you aren't making the speech up as you go along, you can make sure to include all of the points you want to make. You won't leave anything out.

• Because you are going to practice the speech, you'll feel more comfortable with the words and with the delivery. By the time you're ready for the actual speech, you'll be prepared.

• Because people tend to sound monotone when they read something word for word aloud, extemporaneous speaking sounds more natural and more pleasing to the audience's ears.

As you can clearly see, opting for an extemporaneous speech is going to increase the likelihood of your public speaking event going well because it will eliminate many of the problems inexperienced speakers typically encounter.

Alex Berez is author of "Wedding Speeches 101" http://www.TheWeddingSpeech.com

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