Along with the joy and excitement of the New Year’s season, a feeling of sadness often exists side by side. This feeling sometimes grows stronger after the New Year itself has passed. During this period we consciously or unconsciously review the year that has gone by, how it’s met our expectations and the ways in which we have developed or grown.

We also become aware of our disappointments, both in others and in ourselves. The New Year itself can seem daunting to some, challenging to others, filled with excitement or with fear. However, it is important to realize that a new year is new. Just as each breath we take is a fresh one, unless we carry the past with us as heavy baggage, unless we cling to old memories and mistakes, we can begin to live this year in a way that is truly refreshing and healing as well. Each day, each moment offers us this opportunity, if we know how to enter it truly. Whatever has happened, or hasn’t happened, however the new year appears to you, there are several steps we all can take in starting a truly new chapter, making a beginning that is fresh and new.

Step 1 – is to realize that in order for our year to be new, we have to be new. No matter how much we may want to hold onto the old, life itself is a series of changes. When we resist change, we resist life itself. Though difficult at times, change brings new growth, values, goals and understanding. As we say good-bye to plans, hopes, and old ways of being, we can open the door to new experience and fulfillment.

Along with the joy of new growth, growing pains can be common. Don’t be afraid of a little sadness or fear. It is natural, to be expected. Welcome it with open arms in the realization that new life is on the way. Allow yourself to feel what you feel. Then let the feeling go and move straight, directly into the present moment. The present moment is always filled with wonder, freshness and endless possibilities.

Step 2 – Go over your past year with fresh eyes. Instead of finding everything wrong that has happened, find everything right that went on. Make a list of the good things that happened to you. Make a list of the ways in which people in your life pleased you, and the ways in which you pleased them as well. Make a list of the things you admire and respect about who you are. (The more you admire and respect yourself, the easier it is to embark and succeed at new goals and dreams). Most of the time we focus upon the negative and in this manner throw ourselves into depression. Change this habit now. By focussing on what went right each day, the year will be truly new.

Step 3 – Give thanks. Each day find five things and people to give thanks for. Write this down. Then, actually call or write to at least one of the people on your list and offer them thanks for who they are or what they’ve done. This is a wonderful way of freeing yourself from feelings of deprivation and resentment most of us walk around with each day. It is also a wonderful way of realizing the enormous support available to you for realizing new dreams and accomplishing goals. The New Year has endless possibilities. You may make resolutions and create many new goals and dreams. However, without a strong, consistent positive focus, in subtle ways we undermine ourselves. Build this new perspective. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself and others all year long.

Copyright 2006 Brenda Shoshanna

Discover The 2000 year old Zen secrets for being calm, balanced and positive, no matter what’s going on in your life in Living By Zen, by Dr. Brenda Shoshanna, ‘http://www.livingbyzen.com’ Dr. Shoshanna is a psychologist, speaker, long term Zen practitioner and teacher, relationship expert on http://www.ivillage.com and author of many books including, The Anger Diet, Zen and the Art of Falling In Love, Zen Miracles (Finding Peace In An Insane World,) and many others. You may contact her at topspeaker@yahoo.com Her personal website is http://www.brendashoshanna.com

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