One of the most attractive things about someone is their ability to live outside of themselves. Think about it: We are drawn by those unusual people who give all the money that they win to charity, we are emboldened by the single parent who is literally killing herself with three jobs to give a life to her son that will benefit him. We are riveted by people who risk their lives every day to save the one trapped in a dangerous situation.

It’s as if the image of God suddenly becomes more than a shadow of the things to come, but the very essence of a person as they look to benefit others instead of availing themselves.

I know a single woman who desperately wants to be married more than anything. However, her biggest stumbling block is that she is a “taker” and not a “giver”. Despite many potential relationships with pretty eligible guys, the relationships end far from the dreams she dreamed.

Getting a date is not the primary goal. Giving your life in as many ways you can is what fuels us to the finish line. Living a life sold out to Jesus and showing that in hands-on practical ways is the most attractive thing

It’s being utterly concerned with the lost person you work with to the point of taking the plunge of being involved in their lives. It’s changing the diapers in nursery because your forward thinking puts you in those weary parents shoes some day and it’s your privilege to give them a much-needed break. It’s being the most faithful renter your landlord has ever seen.

If this quality characteristic is the most sought after part of who you are, getting dates and keeping them will be the least that you will reap. You will find yourself walking in the footsteps of the One who knew what it was like to touch a leper, heal the broken and befriend the lonely.

There were a lot of people who found that man attractive. They will see Him in you and find it attractive as well. Single. Dating. Married. All of the above. Start giving, not taking. See where it gets you.

Jennifer Rathmell (M.S. Biblical Counseling) is a stay at home mom who has a passion to see people make wise choices when it comes to who they date. She can be found at http://www.christiandatingblog.com

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