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Womens Interests > The Gentleman
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Article rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Author : Ann Gee Yeap
The encounter at a popular shopping mall left me gob smacked. I had just bought lunch and was on my way back to my office. As I meandered my way around, I ended up walking behind 3 teenagers. When we came to a heavy glass door, I juggled my packed lunch and handbag, preparing against having that glass door slammed against my face, after the teenagers had pushed it open. However, the last of the teenagers lining up to walk through, suddenly turned around and held the door open for me ! Actually held the door open for me to walk through before him. I was shocked, to say the least ! So shocked that I ended up muttering a meek “Thank you”.
I am not an old lady, I do not have any disability (well, no visible disabilities anyway), I wasn't carrying a whole load of stuff (I've carried tons of stuff before and nobody offered to help!), I am not a beauty queen, I am not a stunner and neither am I a somebody. So he couldn't have opened the door for me because of all those reasons. The only other reason that could possibly explain this, is he is a Gentleman. A class of men that is terribly difficult to come by in Malaysia, what's more, being a Gentleman towards strangers. A highly commendable act. And a fine example to all other men ! God knows how many doors I've held open for people ...men included.... but for those who have held doors for me are nowhere near even a handful ! Let's not even talk about strangers doing it !
I hear, I hear. Women have fought so hard for gender equality and yet we still expect and appreciate men opening doors for us ? At the same time, many women have expressed that there is not a need for men to open any doors for us, as we are, very well equipped to do it for ourselves. I have thought along that line as
well. But at the end of the day, it isn't about gender equality, it isn't about whether we are capable of opening the doors for ourselves, in fact, we are capable in a lot of other things, but that doesn't mean that we do every single thing by ourselves. It's down to two words, CARE and RESPECT. You cannot have care without respect nor respect without care, unless you want to complicate things. I care for him but I don't respect him or would it work better with I respect him but I don't care for him ? How can you genuinely care for someone whom you do not respect.... is that, at all possible ? Opening a door for any woman, does not mean that women are incapable of doing it ourselves, it is an expression of care from the other party. He's just saying, “Hey, I care for the person who is walking with me, let me open this door for you.”
There has not been any one time, when the door was held open for me,that I did not feel gratitude, appreciation and happiness towards the holder of the door. And there hasn't been any one time that I did not feel the rudeness of the act of men who did not care two hoots who was walking behind them, when they decided to let go of holding the door so that it can slam into your face. Roughman a plenty, Gentleman far and few in between. Perhaps I am too traditional, perhaps, I am from another planet. But surely this teenager who is at least a decade plus younger than I am, does not have a cell of traditionalist thought in him. It's ironic that it takes a teenager to show the acts of a Gentleman. I dream of the day when all are a Gentleman ... somebody get me to a time machine !!
Ann Gee Yeap is a freelancer who revels in the little things in life, that brings an immeasurable amount of hope and optimism.
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