Writing and Speaking > Writing > The Weather Hermit
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Article rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Author : John T Jones, Ph.D.
The weather has been kind of funny lately. The other night we had a man-killing tornado in Indiana and it is NOVEMBER!
Katrina and Wilma and the other girls spewed vengeance across the Caribbean and the Southeast. Added to the tsunami and the horrible earthquakes, things just don’t seem right.
I saddled my horse and headed for the hills to find The Weather Hermit.
I lied there. I didn’t saddle my horse. I’m afraid to get up that high. What if I fell?
If you live where I live, you should have a horse. I do have one. I asked a friend of mine to give me one of his horses, the mare with a white stripe between her eyes. I told him I didn’t want to take the mare or feed her or change her shoes. I just wanted him to keep my mare at his place and I would come by with my grandkids once in a while to look at her. The last time I was over there, he handed me a vet bill. I haven’t been over there since.
On with the lie: I rode for three days up one hill and down the other. I finally reached “Bleach Cave.” Surely The Weather Hermit would be there. I moved the burlap hanging over the mouth of the cave and asked, “Is The Weather Hermit in there?”
A voice came back, “Who did you expect, the The Jolly Green Giant?
I recognized the good-humored voice of The Weather Hermit. He came out,
squinting at the son. “I didn’t know that it was goin’ to be nice today. Let me get my camp chair.”
When he came back he said, “Nice horse!”
I said, “Imaginary!”
He said, “Then why does it smell like a horse?”
I said, to The Weather Hermit, “I’ve come to seek your wisdom. What’s with this freaky weather?”
He said, “It’s Global Warming!”
I said, “I could learn that on television.”
He said, “Where do you think they get there information? Sometime back someone stuck his big thumb into the North Pole and made the ocean 10,000 feet deep there. A hump formed in the Antarctic. Now the globe is in a thigwobble. Things are not goin’ to get any better.”
I said, “You read my article, didn’t you? I didn’t know you had a computer.”
“I don’t,” he said. “I borrowed one from the TV guy for a minute.”
I said, “Are you saying that I started your talk about the wobble in the earth and Global Warming?”
He said, “Could be but I’ll never admit it.”
I got what I usually get from The Weather Hermit.
Nothing!
The End
by John T. Jones, Ph.D.
copyright©John T. Jones, Ph.D. 2005
John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com)is a retired R&D engineer and VP of a Fortune 500 company. He is author of detective & western novels, nonfiction (business, scientific, engineering), poetry, etc. Former editor of international trade magazine. Jones is Executive Representative of International Wealth Success. More info: http://www.tjbooks.com Business web site: http://www.bookfindhelp.com (IWS wealth-success materials / TopFlight flagpoles)
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